• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Blue House Blog

  • Home
  • About
    • About
    • Truth
    • Contact Me
  • Recipes
    • Trim Healthy Mama
    • Nourishing Traditions
  • My Home
    • Remodeling
    • Before and After
  • The Fine Print
    • Disclosure
    • Privacy
    • Media
  • Shop

Freedom is Everything.

August 5, 2019 By Melissa Beene Ford 1 Comment

You know, one of the biggest takeaways for me from seventeen years of enslavement in my own personal hell is that FREEDOM IS EVERYTHING.

Love is freedom, and Jesus is love, and therefore… Jesus is freedom.

Many stories in the Bible point toward how the OPPOSITE of Jesus is enslavement, literal and figurative, and every time there was enslavement, God’s goal was to release people from it. There was never a time that God’s people were enslaved that God did not send a rescue.

After being enslaved in hell for so long, I crave freedom.

I love this stage in my life where I can join a gym if I want to, or have a job, or go out with friends, or go out with friends and (gasp) DRINK ALCOHOL. I can have my own money, and do what I want to with it. Nobody is punishing me and taking away my car keys and debit card. Nobody is screaming at me if I leave my purse in the kitchen or a plate in the sink. Nobody is calling to check up on me every 30 minutes to make sure I’m where I’m supposed to be, or driving by the house to make sure I’m home.

Nobody controls me.

Oh, one of them still tries, but he does not succeed.

He needs to get a life.

Yes, I’m talking about YOU, psycho, since you and your new wife are so obsessed with me that you’re the first ones to read every blog post… hiiiiii! Thanks for driving up my blog traffic with your obsession!

Just FYI, THERE ARE WARNING SIGNS that the person you are marrying is gonna be a control freak who will STILL be obsessed with you, and stalking you, ten years post-divorce, but that’s the subject of another post. I’ll get to that.

Meanwhile, why does it seem like Christian marriages are designed to be the OPPOSITE of freedom? Enslavement is promoted, even. In an abusive marriage? I promise you, 99% of ‘Christian’ counselors will tell the wife to SUBMIT MORE. OBEY MORE. SUBMIT AND OBEY.

Oh, he hit you? Turn the other cheek. Pray more. Submit. Obey.

That kind of ‘advice’ is NEVER given in ANY other context or relationship outside of a ‘Christian’ marriage.

I’m not sure I would have valued my personal freedom had I not lived through that hell, though, to be honest.

I think I sought the security of a legalism and rigid rules and not having to think for myself.

I think being controlled by rules and religion felt safe.

I think, though, that control is progressive, and a man who isn’t much like Jesus will tend toward being controlling, and more controlling, and more controlling, until one day you realize that you’re stuck in hell with no access to money or car keys or any other way of escape from a man who walks in the door screaming at you and the kids every. single. day. for reasons you can neither predict nor prevent.

THANK GOD DIVORCE IS LEGAL IN THE USA.

That’s all I’m saying about that.

Living through that hell changed me and my priorities. I will always:

  • Vote for the candidate who offers the most personal liberty. Smaller government, less taxes, less restrictions on my freedom, no forced “healthcare,” will always get my vote.
  • Take the job that offers the most flexibility. I will always choose the one that lets me go on my kids’ field trips, and offers more work/life balance, even if it pays a little less.
  • Be in the relationship that lets me be me. I’m pretty dang loyal. You don’t have to drive by my house or check my phone. The first clue to me is if he gets irritated if I don’t text back fast enough. Yeah, he says he’s ‘just joking,’ but that’s the beginning stages of CONTROL, and that is the fastest way for me to squeal tires. I will never again put myself in a situation where I have to alienate my family or friends, or I can’t go out with my friends because he’ll get mad, or if I work out and get fit, or succeed in my business, he’ll start feeling insecure and threatened. No thank you.
  • Go to the church where I can dress how I want, drink what I want, worship how I want, and NOT be shamed into submitting to an abusive man. Enough said.
  • Use my money the way I want. Save if I want, give if I want, spend if I want, invest however I want, because I WORK and I can do with my money whatever the heck I want to. I will always be free to tithe and avoid debt and never again be plunged into financial stress because of someone else’s poor choices.
  • Live with less so I can be tied down to less. Marie Kondo is my hero, and minimalism is the goal.

Freedom is everything. Everything. Everything.

And every decision I make is the one that brings me closer to freedom.

Recent Posts

  • Some Humans are Crap
  • Let Mercy Lead
  • In Defense of Mansplaining
  • Lack and Abundance and Marketplace Sofas
  • A Good Man.

Reader Interactions


Comments

  1. Anonymous says

    August 9, 2019 at 9:19 pm

    Bahahahaaha. Delusional. Going to be single cause nobody wants you

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Primary Sidebar

BEST EMAILS EVER

Don't worry, your email is safe with me.

About Me

Hi, I'm Melissa! Texas Girl. Single Mom. Old house fanatic. Welcome to my corner of the internet! I hope to bring you all my deep thoughts about life, Jesus, health and happiness, and decorating my little home without breaking the bank. I will try my best to make you laugh. Or cry... but only for a minute or two. We'll see how it goes. Anyhoo, thanks for being here!! Follow me on Instagram (link below) to keep up with my daily stories. And be sure to subscribe so you don't miss a post.

Follow Me On:

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Snapchat
  • StumbleUpon
  • Twitter

Follow Me on Instagram!

I love Saturday. 💕 Saturday’s my favorite. 😁 Projects going down today, starting with three gallons of white paint from @sherwinwilliams. What in the world should I paint first? 🤔 What’s happening at YOUR house today?
Snow in East Texas. It’s a big deal. ❄️ Snow in East Texas. It’s a big deal. ❄️
It’s a beautiful day if you’re solar powered ☀️ like me. It’s also a beautiful day for napping in the sun ☀️ if you’re like @sophiejunethedoodle. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I feel SO fortunate to get to work from home where I can sit by a window and even open it when the weather is right 👌🏻 even tho I can hear #goldendoodle snores from my home office... 🤔 Working from home has been on my #visionboard for years and it finally happened. 👏🏻What’s on YOUR vision board for 2021? 👉🏻Answer my poll in my stories! 👈🏻 #theresnoplacelikehome #workfromhomelife #iloveworkingfromhome
The whole Christmas 🎄 story, in these lyrics ri The whole Christmas 🎄 story, in these lyrics right here. I believe every word is true. After church this morning I decided these words needed to be added to my chalk wall. 👉🏻 In the darkness we were waiting
Without hope without light
Till from heaven You came running
There was mercy in Your eyes
To fulfil the law and prophets

To a virgin came the Word
From a throne of endless glory
To a cradle in the dirt

Praise the Father
Praise the Son
Praise the Spirit three in one
God of glory
Majesty
Praise forever to the King of Kings

To reveal the kingdom coming
And to reconcile the lost
To redeem the whole creation
You did not despise the cross

For even in Your suffering
You saw to the other side
Knowing this was our salvation
Jesus for our sake You died

And the morning that You rose
All of heaven held its breath
Till that stone was moved for good
For the Lamb had conquered death

And the dead rose from their tombs
And the angels stood in awe
For the souls of all who’d come
To the Father are restored

And the Church of Christ was born
Then the Spirit lit the flame
Now this gospel truth of old
Shall not kneel shall not faint

By His blood and in His Name
In His freedom I am free
For the love of Jesus Christ
Who has resurrected me
HaPPy NeW YeaR! 🎉 Is today the day we throw out HaPPy NeW YeaR! 🎉 Is today the day we throw out the cat houses made of all the Christmas boxes and blue tape, or do we have to wait for epiphany? 🤔 Wishing you ALL the blessings of a brand new year! 👏🏻 May the Lord crown the year with bounty so that even the wagon tracks overflow with abundance. Psalm 65:11 🌱
Instagram post 17875671470084040 Instagram post 17875671470084040
My top nine pics of 2020. 🤷🏼‍♀️ These My top nine pics of 2020. 🤷🏼‍♀️ These all make me happy to look at ~ I do love this little home we have ~ but none of these represent my top moments of 2020, which would be memories I made with the people I love the most. 💕 It’s been a year of the highest of highs and the lowest of lows, but still, the person I am at the end of 2020 is better than who I was back in January in so many ways. Lots of lessons learned. Lots of figuring out what I want and what I don’t and who I wanna be and who I need around me. Can’t wait to see what 2021 holds but I know for sure there will be love and grace and mercy and peace. #topnine #topnine2020 #theyearinreview
Follow on Instagram
This error message is only visible to WordPress admins

Error: API requests are being delayed for this account. New posts will not be retrieved.

Log in as an administrator and view the Instagram Feed settings page for more details.

Search

Join Me On Pinterest

PAST DEEP THOUGHTS

Find the Blue House on Instagram!

I love Saturday. 💕 Saturday’s my favorite. 😁 Projects going down today, starting with three gallons of white paint from @sherwinwilliams. What in the world should I paint first? 🤔 What’s happening at YOUR house today?
Snow in East Texas. It’s a big deal. ❄️ Snow in East Texas. It’s a big deal. ❄️
It’s a beautiful day if you’re solar powered ☀️ like me. It’s also a beautiful day for napping in the sun ☀️ if you’re like @sophiejunethedoodle. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I feel SO fortunate to get to work from home where I can sit by a window and even open it when the weather is right 👌🏻 even tho I can hear #goldendoodle snores from my home office... 🤔 Working from home has been on my #visionboard for years and it finally happened. 👏🏻What’s on YOUR vision board for 2021? 👉🏻Answer my poll in my stories! 👈🏻 #theresnoplacelikehome #workfromhomelife #iloveworkingfromhome
The whole Christmas 🎄 story, in these lyrics ri The whole Christmas 🎄 story, in these lyrics right here. I believe every word is true. After church this morning I decided these words needed to be added to my chalk wall. 👉🏻 In the darkness we were waiting
Without hope without light
Till from heaven You came running
There was mercy in Your eyes
To fulfil the law and prophets

To a virgin came the Word
From a throne of endless glory
To a cradle in the dirt

Praise the Father
Praise the Son
Praise the Spirit three in one
God of glory
Majesty
Praise forever to the King of Kings

To reveal the kingdom coming
And to reconcile the lost
To redeem the whole creation
You did not despise the cross

For even in Your suffering
You saw to the other side
Knowing this was our salvation
Jesus for our sake You died

And the morning that You rose
All of heaven held its breath
Till that stone was moved for good
For the Lamb had conquered death

And the dead rose from their tombs
And the angels stood in awe
For the souls of all who’d come
To the Father are restored

And the Church of Christ was born
Then the Spirit lit the flame
Now this gospel truth of old
Shall not kneel shall not faint

By His blood and in His Name
In His freedom I am free
For the love of Jesus Christ
Who has resurrected me
HaPPy NeW YeaR! 🎉 Is today the day we throw out HaPPy NeW YeaR! 🎉 Is today the day we throw out the cat houses made of all the Christmas boxes and blue tape, or do we have to wait for epiphany? 🤔 Wishing you ALL the blessings of a brand new year! 👏🏻 May the Lord crown the year with bounty so that even the wagon tracks overflow with abundance. Psalm 65:11 🌱
Instagram post 17875671470084040 Instagram post 17875671470084040
My top nine pics of 2020. 🤷🏼‍♀️ These My top nine pics of 2020. 🤷🏼‍♀️ These all make me happy to look at ~ I do love this little home we have ~ but none of these represent my top moments of 2020, which would be memories I made with the people I love the most. 💕 It’s been a year of the highest of highs and the lowest of lows, but still, the person I am at the end of 2020 is better than who I was back in January in so many ways. Lots of lessons learned. Lots of figuring out what I want and what I don’t and who I wanna be and who I need around me. Can’t wait to see what 2021 holds but I know for sure there will be love and grace and mercy and peace. #topnine #topnine2020 #theyearinreview
Follow on Instagram
This error message is only visible to WordPress admins

Error: API requests are being delayed for this account. New posts will not be retrieved.

Log in as an administrator and view the Instagram Feed settings page for more details.

Footer

Social

  • Facebook
  • Google+
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter

BEST EMAILS EVER

Want to be the first to get all of my new posts? Then don't waste another second! Sign up already! All of your dreams may or may not come true!

Don't worry, nobody is sharing your email address.

Search

BEST EMAILS EVER

Want to be the first to get all of my new posts? Then don't waste another second! Sign up already! All of your dreams may or may not come true!

Copyright © 2021 · The Blue House Blog - Designed by That Pretty Face