Covers Over

He who covers over an offense promotes love, the Bible says.

Trying to love other people is the hardest freaking thing sometimes, because I don’t WANT TO cover over an offense.

I WANT Hallmark movie, Nicholas Sparks love where there’s just laughter and loveliness and lip-syncing to Motown songs with a hairbrush as a microphone ALL THE TIME, but somehow God saw fit to surround me with people who test me, man.

Honestly? “Covering over an offense” is what I want OTHER people to do. Like, I fully expect all the important people in my life to cover over each others’ offenses and just love each other, and if they’re married, stay married til death do us part.

If I’m the one who offends you? Well, I had a good reason, so please cover over that offense and let’s move on, thank you.

Somehow it’s harder when it’s YOU being offended.

It’s harder when it’s YOU trying to have a relationship with someone who’s acting like a cave troll.

But if what I want is LOVE from the people in my life, covering offenses is required.

Even from me.

And it seems like I’ve had the opportunity to have to cover some offenses lately. Thank you, God, for that. Ahem.

Sometimes that looks like writing out on paper all of the ways in which someone has offended you, and lighting it on fire in your outdoor fireplace.

Releasing them from any expectation you have of them. Letting it go. Even when NO ONE would blame you for holding a grudge forever, or severing ties.

It feels so freeing to do that… burning it all up. Sending it all to heaven.

But always, “covering over offenses” looks like

• Being humble
• Keeping no record of wrong
• Laying down your own selfish will
• Laying down any emotional debts they owe you
• Laying down any expectation that the other person will repent or apologize
• Releasing the list of ways they have hurt you, when you really want to remind them of it
• Cancelling Festivus

*For the record, I’m not talking about abusers and adulterers and sleaze bags who don’t deserve to have an ongoing relationship with you. That’s a different scenario for another post.

But in every OTHER relationship, even with the people you love, adore, and cherish the most, there will be offenses.

Lord, help me be a love-promoter and a coverer of all offenses.

Amen.