Its a White Thing…. You Wouldn’t Understand.

We have a genetic problem in my family… its called Major Pigmentation Deficiency.

Don’t laugh… its a curse.

Especially since it seems that all my closest friends are part-Greek, part-Italian, part-Indian, or part-SOMETHING that gives their skin pigmentation so that THEY get to look gorgeous and bronzed in the summer and I don’t.

And its so unfair.

With our blonde hair and blue eyes, the sun is murder for us. Seriously. Repeated visits to a tanning bed only manage to lessen the purple tint to my skin… forget a golden bronze glow or a sunkissed shimmer… not a possibility for me or for my offspring. Heck, I’d settle for beige, but we can’t even get a hint of not-blinding-white no matter how much baby oil we slather on before we bake poolside in a bikini for hours…

Not that my kids would be allowed to do such a thing…

Not that I ever did such a thing in the early ’90s…

My little sister and I are both pale and blonde… not so our older sister, who was blessed with beautiful olive skin, dark hair, and brown eyes. Dang her.

As it turns out, my poor children inherited the curse. Especially handicapped by her whiteness is poor little Annie… who is slightly … albino.

Which reminds me of a funny story.

The kids were staying with my wonderful friend Marla for a week this summer while I had to work. And being that my kids are much more pigmentationally challenged than hers, poor Marla was forced to practically drown my poor little darlings in sunscreen before they could swim in her pool each day.

One afternoon, as she was rubbing down Annie with SPF 172, Marla casually remarked to Annie that she was SO WHITE!

Which prompted sweet little innocent Annie to ask, “Am I like the White Witch in Narnia?”

Marla laughed and said, “No, Annie… she’s scary, and you’re FABULOUS.”