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Will Work For Chocolate-Covered Peanuts.

Melissa Beene Ford/ Annie

I’d like to say that my youngest child is potty-trained.

I’d like to say that she’s potty trained long before her third birthday.

I’d like to say that its because I’m the potty-training master, and I possess all the skills required for training a child to go potty in the potty in a weekend, like Dr. Phil says you can.

I’d like to say I’m perfectly consistent, and daily consistently train my child to obey my commands to sit on the potty! And that she always consistently obeys. With a smile on her face.

But the truth is, I’m inconsistent, I have no idea how in the heck to go about training a child to use the potty, she does NOT want to cooperate or obey, and in fact its my hardest parenting challenge to date.

And furthermore, Dr. Phil LIES.

Like he ever really potty-trained a child in the first place. Right.

I don’t really believe in bribing my children to obey, and I think I’ve discovered that therein lies my problem.

I just haven’t really made it WORTH HER WHILE enough to do her bid’ness on the potty. And really, really inconvenient not to.

And I haven’t quite found the right key.

I’ve tried the Dr. Phil method.

I’ve put her in big-girl-undies and let her loose on my rug, and all that does for me is give me reasons to break out the Bissell every day.

I’ve offered her all her favorite things. I ask her if she wants it, she nods “YES!” all wide-eyed, knowing she usually doesn’t get offered such treats, and then I tell her, “Ok, you can have the _______ if you sit on the potty.”

Dr. Pepper? She LOVES Dr. Pepper. I offered her DP, and she said, “Well, actually, I don’t want Dr. Pepper.”

(It cracks me up when a two-year-old says “actually.”)

Skittles? No thanks. I’ve even been so mean as to show her a handful of Skittles, eat them right in front of her, moaning, “OHHHHHHHH, these Skittles are SO GOOD….I wish you could have some…..”

And she rolls her eyes.

M&M’s? Nope.

Cookies? Ice cream? Cake?

A shetland pony?

She couldn’t be any less interested.

Because she knows I’m trying to trick her into doing what *I* want her to do. And she’s just stubborn enough to deny herself sugar, of all things, to remain in control of when and where she potties.

Because that’s all it boils down to for her…..

CONTROL.

I have literally been potty-training for six months and I CANNOT BREAK HER!

OK, granted, not consistently. But whenever she’s home, she’s in big-girl britches. Every time! And we’ve had Thanksgiving break, Christmas break, and multiple long-weekends and it hasn’t taken hold.

But today, I think I finally found her breaking point.

Daddy’s chocolate-covered peanuts.

She spotted the bag and asked for them.

And with a gleam in my eye, I uttered the words I’ve uttered a thousand and seventy-two times…”If you sit on the potty you can have some……”

And I’ll be danged, I think I found her breaking point.

As we speak, daddy is at Brookshire’s buying more chocolate-covered peanuts.

You do what you have to do.

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Comments

  1. Little Chickadee says

    March 13, 2009 at 4:48 pm

    You hit the nail on the head – control. There are two things that you can’t force a child to do. 1) Eat. 2) Use a potty. And they will take FULL advantage of this fact and exercise a little bit of control.<BR/>My first-born trained so easily it was unbelievable. A week running naked around the house, checking for potty every half hour and it was done. He wasn’t even two.<BR/><BR/>2nd child was

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About Me


Hey there... I'm Melissa! Texas girl. Mom to three + one goldendoodle. Believer. Old house fanatic. Creating a happy + healthy home with purpose is my passion. I'm so glad you're here!

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I don’t know who’s big idea it was to strip 80 I don’t know who’s big idea it was to strip 80 years of paint off of this door down to the wood and start over… but that person has no business starting new projects. 😅 My neighbors must have thought this project would never end. *I* thought this project would never end. 😰 If you’re thinking of doing this yourself? Just don’t, ok? Throw the whole door away and buy a new one. 😂🤣 Just kidding.  Old house weirdos like me… we can’t just do things the easy way. Anyhoo… after some trial and error, @sherwinwilliams Celestial is what I landed on, and I have to say… I like it. Periwinkle-ish blue looks great with the yellow house and will look even better when the azaleas are in bloom. Was it all worth it? That’s not important right now. 🤭 Will I do this all again in two years? The magic eight ball says… without a doubt. 👏🏻 I’ve already picked the next color. #gluttonforpunishment #somefoolsneverlearn #oldhouselove #oldhomelove #makinghome #southernliving #gardenandgun #azaleadistrict #tylertx
Spring in the Azalea District makes the winters in Spring in the Azalea District makes the winters in an 80-year-old house completely worth it … what broken pipes, icy hardwood floors and drafty windows? 🤔 I forgot already. #comeonspring #azaleadistrict #tylertx
Happy Saturday ☀️ Happy Saturday ☀️
Salt Lake City is always magical ✨ Salt Lake City is always magical ✨
2022 had its highs and lows for sure, but scrollin 2022 had its highs and lows for sure, but scrolling through my pics from the last twelve months made me realize how blessed and content I am. Prosperity, love, and peace have been ours in abundance, in spite of the pain of losing my dad. The second picture is the last picture of him… the last time I saw him. 💔 But God has been good to my family this year and 2022 is ending far better than it began. 😄 #2022inreview #thanksforthememories
Who wants a Christmas tour of my home? 🙋🏼‍ Who wants a Christmas tour of my home? 🙋🏼‍♀️
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That’s it. That’s the tour. (Slide two). 
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It’s a new trend I’m starting: bare Christmas tree. Lowe’s tag still attached (so quirky and unexpected)! Christmas ornaments still in boxes. Coming soon to an Anthropologie window display near you. 
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Every year I think, “next year I’ll do better. Next year I’ll have it together.” And then, here we are on the SIXTH Christmas that we’ve been in this house, the sixth Christmas I’ve dragged our chaotic bunch of Christmas mess out of a chaotic garage I still haven’t unpacked from our move six years ago. 
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Maybe this year is the year I’ll organize it all and put it back neatly so that by Christmas number 7, it will be smooth sailing. People will flock to my social media to see how I’ve pulled everything off SO PERFECTLY. Next year will be my year. 
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Seems every year there’s less and less bandwidth for all these things. There’s more grief and stress, less money. More demands, less grace. 
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I put this sign on the wall in my office so I could keep it in front of my eyes: Love. Joy. Peace. And all that. I am SO unlike Jesus most days. So lacking in all of these character qualities. And that’s WITH waking up most mornings and spending my first 30 minutes with God Himself. 
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How lost would I be without that? Geez. I can’t fathom. I REQUIRE being transformed by renewing my mind every single morning, and even then, responding to people and life with love, joy, peace and patience doesn’t come naturally. 
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It’s the goal, though. 
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This weary world needs that from us Believers during this season, more than ever… even more than an Anthropologie-window-display worthy Christmas home tour. 
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I’m working on both.
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